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Arranging summer holidays: what other support might help?

Posted by Nick Arora on 27 May 2019 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

This is the last in our series of blogs looking at arranging summer holidays. In this series we’ve talked about why it’s important to make arrangements early, what to do if you’ve reached an impasse and what to do if you feel like you can’t face ever negotiating holidays with your ex again. In this last blog we’re doing a… Read More »

Arranging summer holidays: I just can’t go through this every year

Posted by Nick Arora on 20 May 2019 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

In this series of blogs we’ve been talking about arranging the summer holidays. We’ve talked about why it’s important to start the process early on, and we’ve talked about what to do when you’ve hit an impasse and can’t agree. In this blog we’re talking about not just not being able to agree but about being in a situation where… Read More »

Arranging summer holidays: what if we can’t agree? Our top tips for dealing with an impasse

Posted by Nick Arora on 13 May 2019 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

In our second blog focusing on arranging summer holidays we’re talking about what happens if you can’t agree. This follows on from our blog last week talking about why you should start making arrangements now. Part of our reason for suggesting the importance of making arrangements early is so you can give yourself enough time to deal with a potential… Read More »

Arranging the summer holiday: why start now?

Posted by Nick Arora on 06 May 2019 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

In a new series of blogs we’re turning our focus to the issue of summer holidays. These can be a challenge for parents both in terms of managing childcare around work and in terms of the cost of keeping children occupied. It can be a challenge for separated parents to make arrangements for the holidays and this is what we’ll… Read More »

Your well being in a separation: Is it all too much?

Posted by Nick Arora on 29 April 2019 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

This is the last in our series of blogs looking at your wellbeing in a separation. In this series we’ve talked about the importance of knowing your stress points, of getting support, and given our tips on how you can look after yourself if you’re going through a separation.  In this blog we’re going to look at when it might… Read More »

Your well being in a separation: Looking after yourself

Posted by Nick Arora on 15 April 2019 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

In this series of blogs we’re looking in detail at well being and how to look after yourself during a separation. We’ve already talked about identifying your stress points and getting support when you need it.  The Getting Support blog also looks at how you can support a friend or family member going through a separation.  In this blog we’re… Read More »

Your well being in a separation: Getting and giving support

Posted by Nick Arora on 08 April 2019 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

This is the second in our series of blogs focusing on your well being as part of your separation. The first blog looked at knowing your stress points. In that blog we explained that this can be hard both in terms of knowing your stress points and in terms of ensuring that anyone pressing on those points doesn’t cause you… Read More »

Your wellbeing in a separation: finding your stress points

Posted by Nick Arora on 01 April 2019 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

In a new series of blogs we’re turning our attention to well being. This can sometimes be a forgotten part of a separation but in times of stress and emotional upheaval looking after yourself is even more important. To find out when we’ll be going live to talk about these blogs like our Facebook page. We usually go live at… Read More »

Returning to work following a separation?

Posted by Louisa on 18 March 2019 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

In this blog Claire Gardner shares some insights from her own divorce.  She explains the fears she had surrounding her journey to being financially self-sufficient and how she draws on that to help other women who are having to look at going back to work following a divorce or separation.  Many couples make decisions that one person will stay at… Read More »

A simple way to think about co-parenting

Posted by Louisa on 11 March 2019 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation , Video

This video was put together by Louisa Whitney from LKW Family Mediation and Una Archer, a psychologist, from Parenting after Separation.   Parenting after separation can feel very busy. You may find yourself carrying more responsibility for your child, whilst learning to navigate the co-parenting relationship.   Una and I put our heads together to hopefully help you simplify things… Read More »

This video was put together by Louisa Whitney from LKW Family Mediation and Una Archer, a psychologist, from Parenting after Separation.

 

Parenting after separation can feel very busy. You may find yourself carrying more responsibility for your child, whilst learning to navigate the co-parenting relationship.

 

Una and I put our heads together to hopefully help you simplify things a bit, let go of things that are not essential and make more space for what is important for you. In the video below we talk about:

 

  • Four common influences on co-parents. As you listen about those four common influences we invite to reflect on what is like for you. Are you comfortable with how things are or do you feel it could be better?
  • A way to come back to the present moment and focus on what your child needs from you right now
  • What help is available if you’re finding co-parenting challenging

 

Una Archer is a psychologist who helps separated parents to soften the impact of the separation on their children and to resolve any emotional or behaviour issues that might have cropped up along the way. She provides one-to-one consultations to parents and families, hosts workshops for parents and professionals working with separated parents and runs termly parenting course Parenting More Comfortably.

 

Use this timeline if you want to come back to the specific part of the recording:

0:00 Introductions

3:00 Co-parenting foundation

4:35 Why is it important to know the common sources of pressure for co-parents?

6:20 Four common influences on co-parents that may be taking up your time and headspace, when you could be present with your children:

  • 6:20 Your relationship with your own parents
  • 9:30 Your relationship with the other parent
  • 13:40 Your family and friends
  • 16:30 What you see and hear in the media

21:00 A way to come back to the present moment and focus on what your child needs from you right now

  • 24:10 Your commitment to being secure base for your child
  • 25:40 Supporting your child’s exploration
  • 27:00 Meeting your child’s need for comfort
  • 28:00 Support for you

30:30 Translating the theory into day-to-day parenting:

  • 30:40 How can I be the secure base for my child?
  • 34:20 Taking stock of your co-parenting resources
  • 37:20 How can I support the other parent to be the secure base?
  • 42:40 Friends and family – your village
  • 45:20 Filtering the messages that come from media

46:40 What help is available if you’re finding co-parenting challenging

  • 47:50 How does mediation help?
  • 49:00 Support to nurture secure relationship with your child

 

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