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Debunking the myths: Summarising

Posted by Louisa on 02 March 2015 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

In this next blog in our series looking at what happens in mediation, we are talking about summarising.  Often when a party has expressed a view the mediator will summarise what they have said.  The purpose of this repetition is two fold.  Firstly, it enables the mediator to check that they have understood correctly what has been expressed.  Secondly, it… Read More »

Debunking the myths: Exploring Options

Posted by Louisa on 23 February 2015 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

There is still some mystery surrounding mediation, both amongst people who might attend mediation, and amongst some solicitors who refer clients to mediation.  In the first of a series of blogs examining what happens in mediation we are looking today at exploring options.   When somebody first makes an enquiry about mediation they may have some idea that mediation is… Read More »

Two sides of the same thing

Posted by Louisa on 06 November 2014 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

When couples embark upon mediation they are ultimately looking for a resolution.  They want to be able to find a set of arrangements that will enable each of them to move on.  It sounds like a fairly simple objective when you put it like that.  However, even deciding on the first thing to talk about, and what the priorities are… Read More »

How do I get started in mediation?

Posted by Louisa on 07 October 2014 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

Many people may first decide to seek out a mediator because their solicitor has suggested mediation.  Or they may have read about mediation online, or been recommended to it by a friend.  They may have a general idea about what mediation involves.  For many people the first question is how do I get into mediation, or how do we start… Read More »

Using other experts in mediation

Posted by Louisa on 30 June 2014 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

A separation or a divorce is never just a legal or a financial process.  It is an emotional and personal journey that has been often likened to a bereavement.  When you start in mediation the mediator will explain that other experts may be useful to empower and motivate you to find your tailor made resolution.  The experts can be people… Read More »

My partner doesn’t listen to me

Posted by Louisa on 09 June 2014 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

When a couple decide to separate there can be a huge range of emotions that each has to deal with following that separation.  When the couple start mediation this can make it difficult to hear each other.  How often has somebody started a sentence with something that incenses you so much that you don’t listen to the next bit they… Read More »

We’ve separated. How long before we can sort everything out?

Posted by Louisa on 12 May 2014 in categories: Blog , Uncategorized

It can seem hugely daunting when you first take steps to look at what will happen following a separation or a divorce (or you may only be thinking of separating from your partner or spouse).    There is now a wealth of information on the internet on this subject which varies in its level of accuracy and helpfulness.  Much of… Read More »

What happens in mediation?

Posted by Louisa on 28 April 2014 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

The Family Law Protocol requires all solicitors advising clients about family law to go through their complete list of options with them – even if they don’t offer some of the options as a firm.  All clients seeking advice about a family law dispute should therefore have at least a basic understanding of mediation.  But often that is all it… Read More »

What do family law changes mean for you?

Posted by Louisa on 22 April 2014 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

From today various changes in family law are coming in to force.  There has already been a great deal of change in recent times in family law with the removal of legal aid for most family matters – although it is important to note that legal aid is still widely available for mediation to resolve family matters.  The main three… Read More »

I think my marriage is over

Posted by Louisa on 01 April 2014 in categories: Blog , Family Mediation

For some people there can be a definite understanding that their marriage is over.  They may discover something and feel they can no longer trust their spouse, or they may simply know it is time to turn a new page.  For others it is not so clear cut.  There may be arguments.  There may be a breakdown in communication.  There… Read More »

For some people there can be a definite understanding that their marriage is over.  They may discover something and feel they can no longer trust their spouse, or they may simply know it is time to turn a new page.  For others it is not so clear cut.  There may be arguments.  There may be a breakdown in communication.  There may be a lack of mutual understanding.  But is that enough to mean it’s the end?  It’s never an easy decision.

Further difficulties can arise when one person feels that the marriage is definitely over, whereas the other wants to try to work things out.  It is not uncommon at all to find that one person is at a completely different stage and experiencing completely different emotions to another.  Here at LKW Family Mediation we often give this graph to clients to illustrate the different stages that they and their spouse can be at.

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One of the things that we explore during our initial meetings is whether each party is ready to talk about making arrangements and finding a resolution.  Sometimes one person can need more time.  They might need some help from a counsellor coming to terms with the end of their marriage.  Sometimes they may need to talk about how or why the marriage ended as part of the mediation.  This can be uncomfortable, or appear unnecessary, to the person who is wanting to simply find a resolution.  Often it is only by understanding things that we can accept them.  Talking things through in a safe environment can help someone to understand what has happened and feel able to look towards a resolution.

If you feel that talking through things could help you find your tailor made resolution then please contact us today for a free and informal chat.

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