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Personal growth in a separation: questions to ask yourself

If you haven’t already seen the blog I posted last week then I recommend that you take a look.  I started a conversation about personal growth in a relationship breakdown.  I fully acknowledge that if you are feeling grief stricken, angry, stressed and anxious then you may not be ready to think about this yet.  You may just think things are going to be pretty awful and that’s OK.  There is a grief cycle that goes with a relationship breakdown…

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Life can be good again...maybe in a different way

Could your relationship breakdown be transformational (eventually)?

As with a lot of blogs this series has been circulating in my head for a while.  Sometimes there are threads of things I want to say but the whole vision hasn’t come together, or I’m not clear about what my overriding message is – and a muddle blog post is not much help at all!  There are also times when I think about saying things but I worry that they might be seen as controversial and so I have…

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Heard about family mediation and want to know more about it?

The other day I was asked where the best place was for someone who had heard of family mediation but didn’t know much about it, to find out more information.  That got me thinking about what the key messages are that I would want someone to take away about family mediation (whether with LKW Family Mediation or another service). I thought about this for a bit and then recorded this 3 1/2 minute video that hopefully sums up the most…

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Would things be easier if your ex would only change?

Would things be easier if your ex would only change?  Why filing up your own cup may be more important.   In these challenging times where everyone is dealing with all that life brings with it, and COVID-19, Una Archer and I got to talking about the importance of looking after yourself and how filling up your own cup is the most important thing you can do for yourself, and for your relationships with other people.   We all know relationships…

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Anxiety, separation and the pandemic

  This post is by me, Louisa Whitney, founder of LKW Family Mediation based on my recent experiences.  It is an invitation for us all to reflect on the anxiety we feel and to perhaps look at this through the lens of what is anxiety related to our current challenges, and what is anxiety that is coming from others and society generally. Anxiety is defined on the MIND website as: “Anxiety is what we feel when we are worried, tense…

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Reflections on mediating in a global pandemic

I’ve been reflecting a lot lately on my experiences of offering family mediation during the global pandemic and really wanted to chat this through with another experienced mediator.  I have been feeling anxious this week about the increasing numbers of COVID cases and having just started going back to some meetings in person (albeit with safeguards in place).  One of the great things about mediation is having a support person (called a PPC – Professional Practising Consultant).  I approached my…

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Do I need to mediate: #4 getting an answer

Hopefully if you’ve followed these blogs for the last few weeks then you have a greater idea of the thinking that goes into this question.  In order to help you arrive at a definitive answer the purpose of this blog is to pull the threads together into a thought process. The starting point is do you have issues that need resolving as a result of your separation?  These might be to do with money, or your children, or both.  Or…

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Do I have to mediate:#3 what are the options?

In this new series of blogs we’re looking at the question we get asked a lot which is, do I have to go to mediation.  The first blog looked at what the rules say and the context behind why the rules were made.  The second blog looked at whether you might be able to resolve things yourselves and asked questions about what you need to resolve, and what the barriers might be to this.   In this blog we’re looking…

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Do I have to mediate: #2 can you resolve things yourself?

In this new series of blogs we’re looking at the question we get asked a lot which is, do I have to go to mediation.  The first blog looked at what the rules say and the context behind why the rules were made.  The next blog looks at how you might resolve all the issues that crop up when you separate.  Why is this important?  Well because when a couple separate there are usually issues that need to be resolved…

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Do I have to mediate: #1 the rules

In a new series of blog posts we’re addressing the question “do I have to mediate”.  It’s something we get asked a lot and, as usual, we want to widen the lens a bit on this binary question.  The question is not just whether you are going to HAVE to mediate, but what the alternatives are.  You can decide not to do something only to find out the other options aren’t good for you either.  So the aim of this…

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